Precious Cargo – nonsensical thriller

A crass B-movie that seems to have been entirely constructed from car chases and misogyny, this thuddingly dull-witted thriller makes it to our cinemas on the power of Bruce Willis’s name and little else. Employing a retina-searing colour palette to distract from the fact that the heists make no sense, this production clearly ploughed all its budget into a few slick action sequences and the cameo from Willis. It’s a pity the film-makers didn’t invest in the screenplay.

The characters seem to have been assembled by some kind of random quirk generator: Jack (Mark-Paul Gosselaar) likes to hit golf balls into the sea, which makes him a) a maverick and b) needlessly wasteful with sporting equipment. His sidekicks include a drunk, a badass female sharp-shooter and a browbeaten ex-con who would rather die in a hail of bullets than spend another minute with his wife.