Choosing a primary school: a teacher's guide for parents

What makes a great primary? Let's deal with this one straight away – it isn't what Ofsted says. All the inspectorate has cared about in the past few years is data progression in maths and literacy. Simply put, children have become numbers in these subjects, and if the school's numbers don't reach a certain total, then it automatically "requires improvement", regardless of whether it is a happy school with an enriching wider curriculum. So if your prospective school is proudly displaying that "We Are Outstanding" banner on its perimeter fence, well, that is wonderful … but do bear in mind that in all likelihood it has been awarded for results in those two subjects, rather than for its delivery of a broad and balanced curriculum which brings out the best in every child. Which is, of course, what makes a great primary school. So "outstanding" schools aren't the only outstanding schools, if you ask most teachers.

But what about Sats?

The compulsory tests in reading, writing and maths at the end of years 2 and 6 are often mistakenly seen as the be-all and end-all of a child's chances in life, and the quality of their school. A good set of Sats will leave some parents – not Guardian readers, of course, oh no, perish the idea – leaping with glee at their area's rocketing house prices. Most teachers, on the other hand, are dismissive. Sats don't reflect the bigger picture; rather the tip of an iceberg in the only subjects that politicians think matter. If Sats existed in music, PE or art, and their results were deemed as important as maths or literacy, the tests might go some way towards reflecting reality.

Will my child be happy here?

The first question you should ask yourself on setting foot through the gate is, do you personally feel happy here? Every school has a different feel, and if that feeling is an uncomfortable one, be on your guard. I walked away from at least three schools I was looking at for my own children, even before their headteachers had opened their mouths to introduce themselves. One was brand new but with no spark or flair to indicate a stimulating environment – everything screamed "maths and literacy test results". In another, the building dated back to the Victorian era in more ways than one – every classroom had its desks set out in rows, and displays of facts blocked the windows. There was not a piece of children's work to be seen.

Some schools might have an art studio, an area of forestry in the playground, or a performance stage in the hall – all exceptional assets. Just check they get plenty of use and aren't mothballed while the school concentrates on (you guessed it) maths and literacy.

Your guided tour

Try to arrange your tour face-to-face at the school reception; organising it by phone won't tell you if office staff – the shop window of the school – are friendly or not. It says a lot about a school.

Plan some questions to ask the headteacher. Not too many, mind. You don't want her marking you down as members of the awkward crew. Expect to be taken around the whole site, not just your child's prospective classroom. If the head restricts your access, could there be things they don't want you to see? Untidy cloakrooms, a badly stocked library and arcane computers in the ICT suite; insufficient playground equipment or space. You need to see it all.

The lobby

When you're in the front entrance, get a feel for what's going on. Tours are never timed to coincide with breaks but if there are any children milling about, see what they're up to. If they're on a dutiful errand, for example delivering registers, the school probably encourages a responsible attitude. If they're play-fighting in the corridor without consequence, it tells a less impressive story and could mean a slapdash approach to discipline. Most lobbies will contain a safeguarding policy and staff photographs, but if there are pictures of children as well, so much the better. Nothing makes a better role model for your reception child than other children.

The headteacher

They should greet you as if you are a potential buyer for their £2m yacht. Nothing less. He or she is the face of the school, and everybody involved with it looks to them for inspiration. The best headteachers are like submarine captains – cool-headed, astute decision-makers – who trust their colleagues and surroundings to indicate where their ship is headed. But don't be afraid to casually inquire as to how many disciplinary issues they've had in the past few weeks, and watch for their reaction.

The classroom

These days cramped classrooms are all too common, with class sizes creeping up. Ask if you could quietly venture into your child's prospective classroom for a couple of minutes during a lesson. Some teachers festoon every spare inch of wall with vocabulary choices or maths techniques to use, which look great at first, but to some children might appear quite daunting. You'll probably see unfamiliar acronyms such as Walt (We Are Learning To). Be sure to ask what they stand for and how they are used in practice. Displays should be kept up to date, so if there's one on a certain topic, check that it's at least a recent, if not a current, one.

The staff

Teachers will probably be on their best behaviour for your visit – but don't be upset if they don't even notice you; they've got enough going on. But try to gauge their stress levels. An indicator of a healthy working relationship between school staff is one where everyone makes a point of just saying a friendly hello to one another. If you see this, be impressed. Ask how long staff have been at the school. If everybody seems new, and a lot are newly qualified teachers, then major upheavals have been afoot and unpopular decisions will have driven a lot of staff away.

The children

Do chat to the children, but don't ask them if they enjoy school, because 99% will say "Yes!" Instead, ask them what their writing target is. Depressingly, all pupils will have at least one, regardless of ability, and they're expected to know what it is. How do they react? Do they roll their eyes as if to say "Not this again …"? Or immediately reel off "I need to use more adverbial phrases!" with great enthusiasm? Or do they not have a clue what it means? Their reaction will tell you something about how effective the school's writing policy is, and how popular it is with those who matter most.

At the end of the day, the vast majority of primary schools are vibrant, friendly places and you may struggle to choose one because they all seem so great. Primary schools tend to have the feelgood factor. If you just aren't feeling it, this one's probably a dud.

The writer is a primary school teacher in the south-west of England