Two hat-tricks, two red cards and three penalties. Add in a record SPL win, plus Aberdeen's heaviest defeat in their history, and you would need the space of a phone book to catalogue it all.
With 25 minutes played, the dismal football on offer was the only talking point. You genuinely could not have made up what followed, especially in a 20-minute spell containing two penalties and the same number of sendings-off.
So much for moving on from the recent spat between Celtic and officialdom. It was Gary Hooper, who claimed in midweek that there is some form of bias from referees against Celtic, who notched the game's first hat-trick. Anthony Stokes, Hooper's strike partner, obviously felt left out and recorded his own three-goal salvo.
Two fundamental points emerge. First, Celtic fully deserved their victory and dismantled an Aberdeen team who have now lost their last dozen visits to Parkhead. Celtic played for more than a half with 10 men, but could have fielded seven such was the standard of opposition. There are barely enough adjectives to spell out how bad Aberdeen were.
Second, the key decisions of the referee, Alan Muir, appeared correct, thankfully for all concerned. Even the moaning which surrounded the dismissal of Celtic's Thomas Rogne, in this anti-refereeing atmosphere, were half-hearted.
Mark McGhee has more to worry about than the performance of match officials; Aberdeen's manager is clinging on to his post. McGhee was once a candidate to manage Celtic, but the odds now are strongly in favour of the Aberdeen board dispensing with his services in the not too distant future. These 90 minutes alone were sacking material.
McGhee was hardly helped by his captain, Paul Hartley. The vastly experienced midfielder should have known better than to punch a Ki Sung-yueng shot away from his own goal – more so because the goalkeeper Jamie Langfield was not exposed – in handing Celtic their first penalty. Hartley, once of these parts, was applauded off the pitch as he headed for his enforced early bath. Stokes, who has adapted seamlessly to life at Parkhead, despatched the penalty.
Strangely, Aberdeen could have been in front by that stage after Chris Maguire delayed a shot when sent through on goal, but they collapsed thereafter.
Hooper scored his first after brushing aside Zander Diamond's meek challenge, before the same player slammed home from Niall McGinn's cross. Rogne's rugby tackle on Maguire prompted the opening half's second red card and Langfield then hauled down Shaun Maloney, who did not, unlike Maguire, have a clear goalscoring opportunity, meaning the colour of card shown to the goalkeeper was rightly yellow. Stokes again scored from the spot.Henrik Larsson was a visitor to Celtic Park's main stand. Even when the Swede was in his pomp, there were no league routs such as this.
In the second half the Aberdeen substitute Josh Magennis fired a diving header beyond his own goalkeeper, Hooper stooped to nod home at the back post and Joe Ledley's tame effort somehow slipped right through into the net.
Stokes completed his hat-trick from a one-on-one position. Paddy McCourt rounded off the scoring, again with a penalty, after Maloney was tripped.
McGhee earned a stern talking-to from the referee near the end and he must expect another one from his chairman, which might just cost him his job.