Can someone remind me how to breathe again? Send all advice c/o mylungs@bbc.co.uk*. This tournament has more drama than a Shakespearean thespian convention. Hands up who predicted a 4-0 thumping in Cape Town? Anyone? ANYONE? Joachim Loew's Germany swept aside Argentina with one of the most clinical performances you will ever see at the highest level. Up next for "Der Mannschaft" on 7 July in Durban is Spain or Paraguay, or round three of Europe v South America.

(*Not actually a real email address)

Bienviendos, me llamo Pranav Soneji y soy bastante contento. Can Paraguay buck the trend and halt the European charge, or will the South Americans fall in a similar fashion to neighbours Argentina and Brazil? After a faltering start, stumbling to a 1-0 defeat by opening opponents Switzerland, the European champions are building up a head of steam led by David "El Guaje" (The Kid) Villa. The Barcelona player has smashed in four goals in four matches, cutting in from the left flank with real menace and intent.  More of the same at the Moses Mabhida Stadium this evening? 

Instead of ranting at the TV or shouting at random passers-by about Fernando Torres's indifferent form, whether Spain manager Vicente del Bosque looks a little bit like Rene from 'Allo 'Allo or Paraguay's frugal defence, text me on 81111 (UK) or +44 7786200666 (worldwide), on Twitter via the BBC World Cup group or you can always get involved on 606. Hagalo.

Standing in Spain's way are Paraguay, a team with the meanest defence in the competition. Gerardo Martino's side have conceded only one goal in four matches, expertly organised by Sunderland's Paulo da Silva. In 1811, the landlocked nation of 6.2m people earned its independence from Spain's rule. Some 199 years on, Paraguay have the opportunity to overshadow domineering neighbours Argentina and Brazil and book their place in the semi-finals for the first time in their history.

Spain manager Vicente del Bosque: "We have huge respect for what Paraguay has done and we certainly don't have the guarantee that it's going to be an easy match. You cannot be too optimistic to win, I mean there's so many teams on the same level, we certainly cannot already announce the result. So both teams will be in the same position, which is wanting to win and be in the semi-final."

Paraguay boss Gerardo Martino: "Spain has so much ball possession that it forces you to defend. Teams have prepared a certain way of playing, but Spain still scored. They have ball possession 65-70% of the game and it imposes its style of play on you. We have to keep Spain from passing the ball. We have to move, show mobility up front, so that we can score goals."

One of the pre-tournament favourites for the Golden Boot, Fernando Torres, has been given the thumbs up from Del Bosque - despite barely having a sniff on goal in this tournament so far. "We've got full confidence in him," said the Spain boss on Thursday.  No blond streaks, no goals?       

While Paul Fletcher winces in horror at the ice lolly-licking man next to him in Johannesburg, his blog on Uruguay's incredible penalty shootout win against Ghana on Friday night has generated over 900 responses so far.  It's a simple question - Luis Suarez - hero or villain?  "Referee decision was correct. No rule will be changed regarding to this," says littlejklc.  Plenty of people disagree though.   

So that's it from me, it's time to head over to Jonathan Stevenson in Johannesburg for the fourth and final quarter-final match. Adios amigos, here's hoping for another classic.

Thanks Pranav Soneji - if you really are who you say you are. I’m Jonathan Stevenson, and my entire footballing belief system is being turned on its head during the most incredible month of World Cup action imaginable. Welcome back to Johannesburg, but be gentle with me while I try and figure out just what the blazes is going on.

Paraguay: 1-Justo Villar; 2-Dario Veron, 14-Paulo Da Silva, 21-Antolin Alcaraz, 3-Claudio Morel, 8-Edgar Barreto, 11-Jonathan Santana, 15-Victor Caceres, 16-Cristian Riveros, 18-Nelson Valdez, 7-Oscar Cardozo.
Spain: 1-Iker Casillas; 15-Sergio Ramos, 3-Gerard Pique, 5-Carles Puyol, 11-Joan Capdevila; 14-Xabi Alonso, 8-Xavi, 6-Andres Iniesta, 16-Sergio Busquets; 9-Fernando Torres, 7-David Villa.
Referee: Carlos Batres (Guatemala).

Spain, joint-favourites for this tournament before it began with the recently departed Brazil, have never taken part in a World Cup semi-final head-to-head encounter. Beat Paraguay, and in a tournament that produces a little bit more history every day, they can create some of their own. For the Paraguayans, that job’s already done.

Por favor, hit me with El Banto: get the texts rolling in to 81111 (UK) and +44 7786200666 (worldwide); bung me a Tweet @Stevo_football; and do the business on the 606 page. Spanish, English or whatever - if it’s in the language of football, it’s all good to me.

This evening at Ellis Park in Johannesburg, we will discover our last World Cup semi-finalist. It’ll either be the Euro 2008 winners Spain and their multi-talented squad of footballing superstars, or Paraguay, about to play their first quarter-final at this tournament. Not that easy to predict though is it, this World Cup? Even Nostradamus would have struggled.

These boys have a little bit of previous, you might like to know. In 1998, they drew 0-0 in a group stage game in St Etienne, while four years later Spain triumphed 3-1 thanks to a Fernando Morientes brace and a late Fernando Hierro penalty.

"I may leave tomorrow, but I'd like that these boys continue showing who they are and keep playing real Argentina football. I'm as disappointed as all Argentines. To see my country lose a football match is very hard for someone who has worn the shirt."

In the face of a wholly unpredictable set of results so far, here goes:
Spain 2-0 Paraguay

"It was either because the ball was not in the right spot or because the goalies were good. But he played a great World Cup. To see Messi cry in the dressing room, well, to say that if in some way he didn't honour Argentine colours then that is stupid."

If Spain are going to win the World Cup, a certain striking sensation will be key to their hopes. With Fernando Torres unfit and not firing, the sizzling David Villa will be looking to add to his four goals so far. One more goal and Villa will join Emilo ‘the Vulture’ Butragueno as the leading scorer in a single World Cup for a Spaniard and he’s now only two short of Raul’s national record 44 goals. He also has form against Paraguay keeper Justo Villar, having scored in both Valencia’s games against Villar’s club, Real Valladolid, last season, before he moved to Barcelona for £34.2m in May.

If you don't want to know what sort of game it's going to be, look away now. Here's Paraguay keeper Justo Villar: "It's going to be a good match where you will see two types of football - one side trying to attack skillfully, while we try to stop them and then try to take advantage of our chances."

"We know we're in good shape. We’ve had more than 30 days together training as a team and I think these players want to make history. Paraguay, like all of the South American teams, show so much character, with players who exercise great pressure. They have a similar style to Chile, who we already know about.”

Paraguay captain Justo Villar and Spain skipper Iker Casillas read out Fifa's anti-discrimination message and then we'll listen to the anthems in Johannesburg.

"If I had to consider a tournament of 20 matches against Spain, then I think Paraguay would have fewer possibilities than Spain. But you see in this kind of tournament, it's not just who plays better, but who has the heart, who has the stamina, the wish, who has the fighting spirit and it can come down to one scoring opportunity."

I love that the Spain fans always hum loudly along to their anthem from the stands while the players look so serious. Sorry, more inane anthem chat, I just can't help myself. Moments away from kick-off.

You know, in this World Cup that wouldn't have surprised anyone, would it? Paraguay have the first attack and a lovely lay off tees up a chance for Jonathan Santana on the edge of the Spain box - but his low right-foot drive is saved low down by Iker Casillas.

Lively start from the Paraguayans, getting stuck into the tackle and not giving the Spanish players any real time on the ball.

Spain are lining up slightly differently from what I can see so far, with David Villa in a more central role, Fernando Torres on the right and Andres Iniesta down the left.

It's perhaps not all the one-way traffic many people were expecting - Paraguay have made a decent start and a cross from the right leads to a glancing header wide from Cristian Riveros.

Footballers. Claudio Morel smashes a free-kick from all of 40 yards and that's akin to time-wasting as it flies a good few South African miles over the bar. Why not just mixer it?

Claret alert: Jonathan Santana must have got a whack on his nose because the Paraguayan midfielder has blood pouring from it. He needs a quick mop-up job and a new shirt into the bargain.

It hasn't really got going yet at Ellis Park, a stadium which has, so far this World Cup, shown an unfortunate fondness for Mexican Waves. Let's hope it picks up before that nonsense begins in earnest.

Magically quick feet from Andres Iniesta about 30 yards from the Paraguay goal, but after he is brought down Spain take the free-kick too quickly and they waste the chance to test Justo Villar. Chance-less, so far.

A long Paraguayan free-kick into the Spain box catches Gerard Pique and Sergio Busquets sleeping and Antolin Alcaraz - who Italy know all about - is only inches away from being able to head on goal. Spain are awfully subdued.

Oh. According to my colleague Paul Fletcher at Ellis Park, the Mexican Waves has come out already. Unlike the crowd, Spain aren't in any sort of rhythm at this stage of proceedings.

Better from Spain. Andres Iniesta turns neatly in the centre-circle again and finds Xavi and when he sends David Villa away down the left, his drilled cross is booted away by a defender. Soon after, Fernando Torres races past one defender down their right, but he overdoes it and is tackled by the next one.

Much better. Xavi collects a pass thigh-high about 30 yards out and after spinning 180 degrees, he hits a sizzling right-foot volley that just doesn't come down quite quickly enough, whizzing inches over Justo Villa's crossbar.

David Villa moves into space just inside the Paraguay half and when he sends it out to the right, Andres Iniesta side-foots a first-time right-foot cross into the box, where you want your striker to be attacking - but Fernando Torres had eased off and the ball flies across the area and out.

Spain are not being given any time at all to do their thing and they are going to get increasingly frustrated. Andres Iniesta looks lively, but their build-up is too slow at the moment.

Fernando Torres gets past Antolin Alcaraz down the Spain right, but his cross balloons out of play behind for a goalkick. He's not having a great night again, the Liverpool man.

Nelson Valdez gets one-on-one with Carles Puyol and runs the Barca skipper, but his right-foot shot from 30 yards flies way off target.

"Today, close to the 50 years I will be on October 30, this is the hardest thing I've experienced. This was (like) a punch from Muhammad Ali. I have no strength for anything."

Breaking news: Uruguay's Luis Suarez has NOT been given an extra one-match ban by Fifa for his red card against Ghana on Friday. So if they beat the Netherlands and reach the final, Suarez will be eligible. Happy? Not happy? Then get involved in Paul Fletcher's blog - it's been ablaze with chat all day long.

Ghana's players might not be happy with that news, but they did get to meet arguably the greatest living human being today in the shape of South African legend Nelson Mandela. They deserved it, too. Heroes, the lot of them.

Back under way at Ellis Park in Johannesburg. Now then, where's the drama from the three previous quarter-finals coming from?

Spain's build-up is still laboured, yet when Paraguay search for an opening they are looking for a quick ball to Nelson Valdez, who is trying to get in behind Carles Puyol and Gerard Pique. He's a danger.

The work-rate of these Paraguayans has to be seen to be believed, it's terrific. Fernando Torres and David Villa both go down just outside the box, but there's nothing doing either time.

Spain seem flat, which is hard to believe in a World Cup quarter-final. Especially when you're one of the favourites. And lots of the other favourites are already out. And your country has never won a WC quarter-final before. Hmm.

Hallelujah! Cesc Fabregas is about to come on for Spain. They desperately need the Arsenal captain to inject some life into their display.

Haha. When Oscar Cardozo missed his penalty, there must have been at least three Spanish players inside the area. For a game that was pretty lifeless for so long, that was an extraordinary spell.

Much nicer stuff from Spain as they work it from right to left, but then when Joan Capdevila picks out Andres Iniesta on the edge of the Paraguay box, he leans back and lofts one into the Johannesburg night sky. My boss just reminded me it's 0-0, which I'm a little bit grateful for (the reminder, not the scoreline).

David Villa bundles his way into the Paraguay box and goes to ground, but this time Carlos Batres isn't having any of it. Andres Iniesta weaves his magic down the left and gets to the byeline, but his cross is blocked.

Spain continue to probe, but we're edging closer to extra-time in Johannesburg. Germany, who will play the winners, must be licking their lips.

Andres Iniesta is blocked off as he surges into the Paraguay box again and when the ball comes out to David Villa outside the box on the left, his right-foot curler sails a couple of yards over. Can Paraguay, who have worked so hard, create something in the closing stages?

Sergio Busquets gets caught in the face and that boy knows how to go down and stay down. Valuable seconds eaten up, Spain are on the brink of the semis.

That might have been Paraguay's chance. They break down their right and Lucas Barrios has a shot spilled by Iker Casillas, before the keeper makes a brilliant block from Roque Santa Cruz's rebound effort.

Jonathan Santana tries to volley goalwards from 10 yards, but Sergio Ramos bravely sticks his head in the way and gets a boot flush on his face. He stays down, so we're not done yet.

Spain are keeping the ball and killing the game. They're closing in on a semi-final berth.

Oscar Cardozo, who missed a penalty for Paraguay, pulls his shirt over his head to try and hide the tears. He's distraught - that's what this World Cup does to people.

"It feels good, but we've done nothing yet. We're happy because it was a difficult game, but we want to improve and reach the final. We watched Germany and they played very well so we know it'll be very difficult, but we must play at our best."

Right, here's a late doors talking point: have we just had the greatest set of World Cup quarter-finals since 1970? Discuss.

Tuesday  6 July, Cape Town:
Netherlands v Uruguay 1930 BST

Wednesday 7 July
Germany v Spain 1930 BST
(Live on BBC One and this website)

Spain striker David Villa now leads the race for the Golden Shoe on five goals, ahead of Gonzalo Higuain, Miroslav Klose, Thomas Mueller and Robert Vittek. He's also moved one behind Raul's Spain record of 44 goals.

This World Cup's so brilliant even the 1-0s leave you an emotional wreck. I'm done, so you have a lovely rest of the weekend, try and squeeze some work in on Monday and I expect I'll see you on Tuesday for the Netherlands v Uruguay. I'm just gonna sit here and count down the hours. Seriously. Night all.